To Strike an Iceberg
by Priest of Life
Summary: As a celebration for beating the game, Jade has ordered tickets for everyone on a one-way trip from Southampton to New York on the most famous ocean liner to ever ever—exist the RMS Titanic. Though it was guaranteed smooth sailing, something goes wrong and they are sent to the wrong timeline, only to find themselves trapped on the ship's ill-fated maiden voyage.
1. Chapter 1

"What the fuck is that thing?" Karkat can't be more confused at what exactly Jade is doing. "Harley, hello? I'm asking you a fucking question."

"I can hear that. You'll just have to sit and wait with everyone else," Jade replies, not even looking up from the monitor. Karkat grumbles and storms off in the next room were everyone else, besides Jade, sits in anticipation of her anniversary gift to all of them. What anniversary, you ask? It's the anniversary, in years, of their success in Sburb, or Sgrub for the trolls. To celebrate, Jade has gathered all of the trolls, pre and post scratch, and all the humans, pre and post scratch together. She also invited Calliope for helping with the post scratch session.

She told everyone that she had a gift for them. It was something that no one would ever think of—especially the trolls and possibly Calliope. It would be so big that John would squeal like a fangirl when he found out. All she has to do is order the tickets ... and done! Trolls and cherubs really need to share more of their technology.

She gets up and slowly walks into the other room where everyone sits in anticipation. Some of the more jittery ones, like John and Jake, can barely keep in their seats. Even the more tranquil ones, like Rose and Kanaya, can't hold in their excitement.

Looking around Jade decides that she's tortured everyone long enough, and decides that she should tell them all now before they explode from the suspense. "Okay, everyone," she says as calmly as she can, "I have some very exciting news."

"Spit it out already!" Karkat get frustrated with the dog girl.

"I was getting to that. As I said, I have something extremely exciting planned for all of us on this anniversary of our success." She pauses, then after a minute, she exclaims, "I have ordered some tickets to board the _RMS Titanic_ for her maiden voyage!"

The only one that seems truly excited for this is John. He had heard of how luxurious it is and always wanted to ride it, but he knew that they scrapped it or something. The four post scratch kids and all the trolls just looked confused. What is this "R.M.S. Titanic"? And that's exactly what Dirk asks.

"Dirk, the R.M.S. Titanic was the most luxurious ocean liner to ever be built by human hands," Rose says. "But—"

"Then why haven't we ever heard of it," he responds, pointing to himself, Roxy, Jane and Jake.

"I think it was only built in the beta universe, so you wouldn't have known about it. Now—"

"So does this mean that we're going out on a cruise," Jake asks excitedly.

"Not really, being Titanic wasn't a cruise liner. It was an RMS," Dave says.

"What does that mean?"

"Royal Mail Steamer. But it did carry passengers."

"Dave, Titanic was an ocean liner. It just carried the prefix RMS," Aranea, who studied the human race extensively said. "But didn't it sink?"

"Yes, but we will be sent to a timeline in which she goes through her maiden voyage with no troubles at all," Jade replies happily.

"Jade, I'm just curious here, but what cabins will we be staying in," Rose asks.

"I bought seventeen First Class berth cabins for us. One of us will have one all to him or herself."

"And how much did this cost?"

"That really isn't anyone's business—"

"I asked you how much it costs."

"Fifty-nine thousand five hundred dollars in todays money," Jade says shyly.

"How much?"

"Fifty-nine thousand five hundred dollars," Jade says louder.

"Jade," John complains as he stands up. "That is way too much for us."

"I'm sorry! I just wanted to do something big."

"So, when do we leave," Meenah asks.

"Considering it is in our old universe in 1912, anytime after the tickets arrive, assuming we have a way to travel back in time to then." Jade can't hold in her excitement.

Thinking back about two minutes prior, Vriska remembers Aranea saying something about it "sinking," so she must ask her question, being a pirate and all. "Uh, what exactly is meant by the term 'sinking?'"

"Well, the official term that the humans use for it is 'foundering,'" Aranea says, "but it means that the ship or boat fills up with water and goes down to the bottom of whatever body of water it's in. Of course, this wouldn't be the kind of thing to be discussing while talking about taking a trip on the most famous ship in human history." Okay, so perhaps Jade's plan isn't going to work out, what with everyone talking about sinking ships and all. Nevertheless, she is determined to make this work. Just as she promised, she's giving them something big as a reward for their efforts in beating the game. But let it be known that it has been guaranteed that there is no way this can go wrong. The travel site that she used is the most trusted out there. There has only been one time that there has ever been a glitch in the system, but unbeknown to all the kids, that one time has yet to come …


	2. Bon Voyage

To understand the peril that would be brought upon by the travel site, it must be understood that none of the players have any of their powers left. The game just snatched them all up when it was beaten. Therefore, all of the players are now mortals. What an ultimate prize that turned out to be.

The tickets arrive within hours, and within hours, the children and trolls are all packed and ready to be taken to Southampton circa 1912. Along with the tickets came a card, which the author cannot for the life of him figure out how to post on this site, with information about the vacation, false identities—which would be used only for boarding, and a little green button that would teleport the group to the exact location and time that they need to be.

"Now, everyone, remember that we will all be first class passengers. This means elegance and wealth. No horsing around, or, I guess hoofbeasting around for the trolls, and act like you have a crapload of money," Rose explains to everyone. "Dirk, considering you have John Jacob Astor's ticket, you will be playing the part of the wealthiest person on the ship, and in America, for that matter." She gives Dirk a smile, not knowing the fate of the real John Jacob Astor. Over the weekend she went out with Jade, Roxy, and Calliope to shop for clothes for everyone to suit the time period. They came back with dresses, suits, gowns, necklaces, rings, earrings, and more. They packed their normal clothes, but only for when they are in their own cabins. Everyone stands in the room, holding their tickets. Jade checks to make sure she has the emergency button before pressing the departure button. Everyone is surrounded by what appears to be lightning, before they find themselves in an entirely different location, wearing completely different outfits.

**. **

**Southampton, England—April 10, 1912**

Thirty-one people step out of vehicles that just pulled up to the dock. One by one they step out of the early cars, servants ready to take their luggage to their cabins. The ship that rests before them is huge—882 feet long, 92 feet wide, 175 feet tall from the keel to the tops of the funnels, 46,000 tons. In other words, it's the largest ship in the world. And it's beautiful. They meet up together so they can board together. "Oh, it's so beautiful," Nepeta says. "I mean, I knew it was from the pictures, but in real life, it's just … amazing!"

"I bet it's even better on the inside," Feferi responds, awestruck at the behemoth before her. Alternia had ships, but none were this big. Thinking back to the card, she wondered what it meant by "it hit an iceberg and sank." Back home, none of the ships "sank," or as Aranea put it, "filled with water and went down. She doesn't worry, however, because she, Eridan, Meenah, and Cronus are all seadwellers, so if anything were to happen, they are sure to survive. Her fantasy is interrupted by Jake.

"Wait, where's Roxy and Dirk," he asks.

"They'll board later," Rose says. "Their tickets have them down as John Jacob and Madeleine Talmage Astor. They'll board in France. Now, I think it's about time to board. We do only have a couple minutes before they stop." With that said everyone leaves together to board the ship. They walk up a steep ramp to the door. The last of the group enters right at 11:30 a.m. After him, they close the door. Each is led to his or her or their cabin. Calliope stays with John, Rose with Karkat, Cronus with Eridan, Meenah with Aranea, Rufioh with Horuss, and everyone else with their matesprit. Damara gets the cabin all to herself. No one wants to listen to her Japanese pornographic mouth. After everyone is unpacked, they head up to the A-Deck promenade to wave goodbye to everyone else on the ground. The clock strikes 12 noon and the tugs begin pulling the ship out of port with her engines firing up. A few minutes pass as _Titanic_ begins to build speed. The ship just leaves port when people are heard beginning to panic toward the stern. The group hangs out of the promenade to get a closer look when they see a smaller ship about to hit the fast-approaching stern. The kids look on in horror just as the smaller vessel moves away at the last second.

On the bridge, Captain Smith looks back, trying to figure out what's happening. People watching from the ground see that the wake from _Titanic _is causing the _New York_ to bob up and down with enough force to snap its line connecting it to _Titanic_. _New_ _York's_ stern swings toward the larger vessel. Somehow, the _Vulcan_ is able to get two lines connected to the other two vessels, pulling the smaller's stern away as Captain Smith calls Full Astern, lessening the pull on the _New York._ The two ships came four feet from disaster.

After the crisis is narrowly averted, the group goes back and spends the first few hours exploring the ship. It's absolutely beautiful on the inside. A few of the boys break off the group to socialize in the first class smoke room. The rest head to a café for lunch. After lunch they all head up to the boat deck and walk around until the ship stops in France.

** .**

**Cherbourg, France—April 10, 1912**

Everyone comes back together on the boat deck to watch as the ship docks in France to pick up a few more passengers and supplies. They anxiously watch as people board the ship, waiting for the last two members of their troop. Dave looks at his watch. It's only 6:40 p.m., which means that they've only been docked in France for ten minutes. They all go back inside after the ship leaves for Ireland at 8:00 p.m., sad that Dirk and Roxy never made it aboard. When they head back into the first class lounge, they hear chatter among the other first class passengers, and one person walks up to Karkat and whispers into his ear, pointing to two familiar faces that just walked in. "Hey, look, it's John Astor and his wife. I hear she's younger than his son." Karkat, of course, didn't hear that last part because he was to busy trying to figure out why exactly none of the kids or trolls recognized Mr. Astor and his wife. They wait a few seconds before the couple notices their presences and walks over, greeting everyone with smiles on their faces. "I was wondering where we ended up," Dirk says when he gets to them.

"Yeah, we were like, nowhere near where we needed to be," Roxy complains as well.

"Well, I guess history is trying its best to keep us historically accurate in this timeline. I assume we will be out of its grip by the fifteenth," Rose says. "Now, I hope you are willing to join us for dinner?"

"Rose, do you really think you have to ask? You know Striders are always hungry," Dirk says, replacing his uncharacteristic smile with a more in-character smirk. "I feel exposed without my shades, though." Dirk had to realize, though, that during this time, people didn't wear sunglasses, let alone weird anime shades. "So, are we actually the last people to board or what?"

"No, according to the schedule, we are supposed to stop in Queenstown, wherever that is, and then we'll be heading toward America," John says, looking at a sheet of paper in his hand.

"John, Queenstown is in Ireland," Rose corrects him. "You might not have heard of it because it went through a name change sometime between now and the time we were born." With all that said, they all decide to head to a restaurant for dinner. At the table, they tell Dirk and Roxy of all that they did while they were waiting to arrive in France to pick them up, the near-miss with the other ship, and, of course, Karkat's whining about how this ship can't be advanced because it doesn't have a television or anything. Nothing is complete without his complaining.

"Well, I wish that we could've seen that," Roxy says when they explain the near collision. "I can't really say the same for Karkat's whining, though."

"Yeah, we all take a vacation on this goddamn ship and all that we do is dis me! Of course!" Karkat gets up and storms out of the restaurant. No one goes after him, though. They all figure he'll just walk around and blow off steam or just go to bed. After an hour of chatting, they all decide that they should probably get some rest for the next day. They can finish catching up then.

And thus was the end of the first day of the ill-fated voyage.


	3. Take Her to Sea, Mr Murdoch

"You are being childish," Rose scolds Karkat when she returns to their cabin on A-Deck. She moves over and sits on their bed next to Karkat and rubs his shoulders. Just by the way he's breathing she can tell that he is perfectly awake and aware of her. "Karkat, you have to realize that this is the year 1912. Humans didn't have what we would call advanced technology, but this ship is well ahead of her time. She is not only the most luxurious, but the largest on Earth."

"You think I'm upset about that?" The irritated troll sits up and stares Rose in the eyes. "I'm pissed because everyone is making fun of me!"

"No one is making fun of you. Roxy was just saying that it would be nice if you for once weren't ranting about anything. Humans never achieved the technology that trolls had. We simply hadn't enough time in the life of our planet, or our universe. You complained because the toilet seat was cold, you complained because there wasn't even a television in the room, you even complained that you couldn't even get on the Internet. Televisions wont be invented for another fifteen years, and it won't be out for commercial use for almost twenty more after that. The Internet won't be out for commercial use for another eighty-one. When we say luxury, we mean simple yet elegant. Titanic was just that on the inside. It is simple compared to more modern—our time—ships, but back here in 1912, it was the most extravagant thing built by humanity, and knew nearly no limit to elegance. Even at the time when we entered Sburb, she was still considered to be the most elegant ship to ever exist." Rose pauses to let this all sink in to Karkat's mind. "We grew up too dependent on technology. If you ask anyone on board this ship what technology is, they'll probably tell you something along the lines of, 'A telegraph," or 'A movie projector. All would be relatively primitive compared to our technology." She watches as the troll buries his face in the soft pillow and almost dreads having to share a bed with him. She would much rather have stayed with Kanaya, but alas, homosexuality was frowned upon during this time, and the _Titanic_ had no known lesbians on board. "Now, I'm going to take a shower. Try not to destroy anything out of spite. I'm quite positive the temporary inhabitants of this cabin on the next voyage are going to want it to be as perfect as it was when we came aboard." With that said, Rose gets up and leaves. Karkat watches the last ruffle of her dress exit the doorway and turn in the direction of the shower. He feels nothing more after that aside from an ever so slight brush against his arm as the other climbs into bed.

.

**April 11, 1912**

"Mr. Strauss, I thought we discussed this, you must unsew your mouth and speak at least once on this voyage. That was the deal." John scolds Kurloz at the breakfast table in the First Class Dining Room. "How are you even going to eat?" Kurloz just shrugs his shoulders and waves him off. He then turns his head and smiles at Meulin over a joke that they share frequently. Meulin repeats this action. "Something tells me you starved to death," John grumbles when he realizes that they have ignored him for the past thirty seconds. Once again, Kurloz waves him off.

Just then a waiter arrives at the table to take orders. When he gets to Kurloz, the latter just signs his order. This confuses the waiter. "I'm sorry?" he says.

"He's mute," Gamzee comes to Kurloz's rescue. Gamzee's voice has become surprisingly smooth, unlike anything any of the kids have heard before. And it's absolutely beautiful to listen to. Gamzee orders for Kurloz, much to the latter's dismay. After all, he can't eat; his mouth is sewn shut, but the other passengers and crewmembers on the ship can't see that. They have all just assumed he was a silent person. When the waiter leaves to put the orders in, Kurloz gives Gamzee an unamused glare, his chin slightly resting on the thumb of his fist with his index finger covering his lips.

"Kurloz," Rose says across the table, "back in this time, it was customary for the wealthy to have several meals a day: breakfast, brunch, lunch, a midday snack, a several-course dinner, an afternoon snack. You would seem out of place if you didn't at least pretend to eat."

"Does he have to eat?" Meulin shows a little worry in her voice.

"Yes, for a couple reasons. One, for what I've already said. Two, if he doesn't he'll just die again. I'm quite positive a death on the Titanic's maiden voyage would stir up some controversy."

"Yeah, because it sank," Dave interrupts.

"Not in this timeline, remember," Rose corrects him. "Never shout 'founder' on a sailing ship. We don't want to stir up some panic for the future."

"Besides," John involves himself, "it is _unsinkable_." He gives a wide smile at the word "unsinkable" as if it has some sort of supernatural meaning.

"John, it is claimed to be _practically_ unsinkable. There is a difference. The 'practically' was dropped a few decades after the sinking in the successful timeline for dramatic effect." Kurloz throws up his arms in the "I'm done" manner and takes his claw and slides it seamlessly between his lips, cutting cleanly through the thick thread holding them together. He pulls the thread out of his lips and wipes the indigo blood forming around his mouth on a napkin.

"What. The. Fuck," Dave says in disbelief at what just happened. How could anybody do that without feeling even a little bit of pain? Kurloz stares at everyone with annoyance in his eyes. "I'm fine," He whispers silently into Meulin's ear when she looks at him worriedly. The sudden voice takes her somewhat by surprise. After all, she hasn't heard a voice as deep and smooth as his in millions of sweeps. She had grown used to the silence, the guilt buried deep inside her for him doing what he did.

.

Around 11:30 a.m. they arrive at Queenstown. The group splits up to go explore the ship more. Even Meenah is impressed by the awful décor. Trolls never had anything like this. All of their ships, even on Beforus, were either slave, cargo, or gamblignant. There was no passenger service, and certainly no luxury to any of them. They were built to the highest standards to get the job done. And not one ever foundered. Ever.

The mahogany interiors of the lounge and smoke room were incredible, and Kurloz shared a box of cigars with Gamzee, Horuss and Equius in luxury, and they had even gotten the chance to speak with J. Bruce Ismay. Ismay told them everything they wanted to know about the ship. He told them about White Star Line's dream of a three-ship shuttle service between Southampton and New York, how Titanic is the largest and most luxurious ship on Earth, and how she is nearly unsinkable. Rose left out a lot of details.

Calliope joined Rose, Roxy, Kanaya, Jade, and Meulin in the First Class Reading and Writing room. Kurloz wasn't allowed back. No one was quite sure why until Margaret Brown approached them and started a lively conversation. She explained to them that rooms like this one are reserved for women only, whereas rooms like the Smoke Rooms are reserved strictly for men.

.

**The Bridge, 1:30 p.m., April 11, 1912**

First Officer William Murdoch approaches Captain Smith, who is overlooking the well bow. "Sir, we are ready to set sail for America." Captain Smith looks back and gives a soft smile. This isn't the start of his final voyage before retirement, but it feels as though it's just beginning. He feels honored to serve on the finest ship on Earth. "Alright," he replies quickly. "Take her to sea, Mr. Murdoch."

"Aye, sir," Murdoch replies before heading back into the wheelhouse to turn the engine telegraph, telling the workers in the engine room to once again start the engines and get _Titanic _sailing. All that lies ahead of them now is the open ocean, blue as blue can get, and the ship slicing through water like a hot knife in butter. Nothing stands in their way but time. Within minutes she has built up amazing speed, and Murdoch gives them the order to set the engines to Full Speed Ahead.

On the stern, Kankri, Cronus, and Mituna watch as Ireland fades slowly into the horizon. The three trolls don't yet realize that this will be the last land they see for almost a week. Apparently, none of them have ever been on a ship before. That, or they just don't know what an ocean is.

Later that evening, Dirk, Roxy, John, Kurloz and Meulin sit at a table in the port side A-deck verandah café while they wait for everyone else to get ready for dinner. Dirk and John both sip of cups of coffee while the other three enjoy glasses of iced tea. "Well, I have to admit, this ship is amazing for being in such an early time," Dirk says as he sets his cup back on the table, careful not to spill any of the hot liquid out onto the white tablecloth. "I had my doubts, but I find it rather difficult to be bored on this ship, despite the lack of our advanced technology."

"I know," John responds. "I knew it was nice from the movie, but had no idea that it was this amazing in real life." He flashes his teeth in an overly-bright smile.

"There you are," a voice behind Dirk, who sits with his back to the revolving doors, says with a tone of triumph. "I've been looking all over this ship for you." The five people sitting at the table look up just as Margaret Brown joins them at the table. "So, how has your time on this ship been so far?" Margaret looks at Dirk with a kind face, determined to get an answer out of him.

"I'm sorry, but who are you," Dirk asks. The others at the table hold the same look of confusion as he does.

"John, don't tell me you forgot what I look like already! We may be on the largest ship in the world, but I'm quite certain that your memory holds better than that!" Margaret gives him a friendly smack on the arm.

"Uh, I'm sorry, ma'am," Kurloz interrupts, confusing John, Roxy and Dirk, thinking that the voice came from elsewhere in the room, "but what he means to say is 'who the fuck are you?'" Margaret gives him a look of discontent.

"Perhaps someone should teach you table manners," she replies. "It is discourteous to swear in the presence of a lady, especially at a casual gathering such as this. But if you must know, I'm sure Mr. Astor here can fill you in on the details. Right, John?" She turns to look at Dirk, who seems deep in thought. "I'm terribly sorry, but if I may, I would require to be excuse from this conversation for a couple minutes. I have some business to attend elsewhere on the ship," he excuses himself.

"It couldn't wait?" Margaret seems to know what he's up to. He knows that he must come up with an excuse, but he must be polite about it.

"It is kind of important business. I'm afraid that it might not be able to wait. I will return shortly." With that said he gets up and leaves the table to hunt down Rose. Rose is found in the Reading and Writing room, carrying on a polite, gossip-filled conversation with another passenger. She notices him standing impatiently at the door and excuses herself from her conversation. "Dirk, this better be important," she complains when she meets him in the corridor.

"I is. A woman sat down with us and claims to know me, but I have never seen the broad before."

"Dirk, it is indecent to call a woman a broad. Especially in these days. Keep in mind that we are filling the places of historical figures. She sees you as a person who she actually knows. Please describe her."

.

Just as he said, Dirk returns to chat with the other five within minutes. "I'm terribly sorry for that," he says as he sits back in his chair, "I hope Mr. Strauss was kind to you in my absence?"

"Ida kept him in check. Now, you were going to explain." Margaret gives Dirk a knowing look, though in reality she has no idea he isn't her good friend.

"Yes. Everybody, this is Margaret Brown. She has been touring with Madeleine and me for the past several months."

"We know," Meulin says. "She told us while you were gone." The five give off small laughs at Dirk's embarrassment.

"Now, now, Ida," John interrupts the giggles, "He wasn't supposed to know that part." The rest of the conversation goes smoothly, and the five kids invite Margaret to join them at dinner when they receive the call.

During the dinner, Margaret spreads gossip about her husband and is attentive as the rest of the kids share stories of their own—made up, of course, but according to the time period nonetheless.

After dinner, everyone retires to their cabins. The day, though calm, was tiring. Perhaps they just need time to adjust to the luxury.

Thus was the end of the second day of the voyage.


End file.
